Doubt

A friend ask me the other day
if I am still afraid.
The answer is YES.

No matter how hard I try, somehow the trauma is still there. It's not easy to get rid of that kind of feelings. Perhaps I'll never get over it. It's already been so long. They said I look really tough on the outside, but who knows what's in the inside? Even myself don't have the answer. Sigh...

Gotta know a new friend that day. He's kinda different I suppose. Different in both good and bad ways. He really reminds me of someone I know in the past. Gosh...I sound so old here...in the past means around 4/5 years ago la..Though he's a bit slow, but he's a really nice guy. (p/s I'm not interested in him ok though)

I can't believe I've only been here for 2 weeks! arghhh... it really felt like years...I'm really beginning to doubt myself, if....there are too many IFs already until I'm not in the right mind now.

Am I really that bad? Sigh...